craps

2011-10-10T01:00:00.001+08:00

我发现用中文写博客的感觉就是不同，虽然时间会比较长，但是要表达的含义在相比之下，会比较丰富。

最近，很多事情发生了。自己也变得比较忙。但是忙得很开心。

佛堂的活动比以前多了很多。一个接着一个。有时还觉得挺累的。但是看到师父的累和她的无法入眠，我们再累也比不上她的。

大专营的行政，做的一大糊涂。还好只是我们自己人知道，来参加营的参加者不知道。

美满姻缘展，展现了不同宗族婚礼的特色。前阵子忙着把展览的文字改好，终于好了。周四周五，又下去帮忙把展览的物品放上去。

结下来，还有更大的菩提眷属，让夫妻能够重新对彼此许下诺言。

这只是佛堂的活动。还得顾好学校的成绩。和感情的难题。

已经慢慢的把她也忘了。。本来以为自己应该是不会那么快又对另一个女生产生感情，怎么知道，一次的晚餐聚会，居然会让我的心有点动摇。只是约了在上海认识的那群朋友，没想到既然会把事情越描越黑。原本只是对她影像不错，但是其他人一直在问我们对彼此有关感情的问题。连她也不断的问我喜欢哪一类型的女生等等。有点让我感到不好意思，但起码我对她的认识和要求有更深的了解。

第一次发现自己对她有好感的时候是周三。周三是party night。我以为她会慢慢的解酒，所以发了短讯，问她是否去了酒吧，结果她迟迟没有回我的短讯。我才开始紧张，开始失望，开始不知所措。一个小时后，她才回我的短讯，让我乐开了怀！！没想到这一点小事，也能把我弄得这么乱。。。

朋友开始关心我跟她的发展。但是我想，大家都在忙自己的功课和作业，除了发短讯和在脸簿聊聊天，也没什么值得提的。

我想，就顺其自然吧。。。

2011-06-20T11:19:00.004+08:00

whyy?? why must you make me so miserable?
why do you initiate to talk to me at times and why do you disappear for some time? one disappearance is more than a week, without telling me where you will be...
why are you hot and cold at times.. are all girls like that?? when they are happy, they will be close to you and when they are not happy, they will just disappear..
i emailed.. i smsed.. i have done all i could.. but still no response from you..

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??????????

2011-05-25T14:30:00.003+08:00

你是回来了，回到新加坡了。。。
但是怎么跟你不在新加坡的日子一样？？
你在不在新加坡，似乎没有分别。。。
嘿，我该怎么办呢？有人可以跟我说吗？？？？？？

2011-05-17T14:13:00.000+08:00

i miss you! you are back in singapore, right? but why arent you onlineeeee :(

2011-05-09T16:55:00.001+08:00

原本是打算来上海把她忘了，但却发现自己好像越陷越深。。似乎无法控制了。。。
每天，都很盼望自己可以在网上碰到她，但又担心彼此会没有共同的话题，这也就产生了一点矛盾。这都是自己过度的担心，因为她也开始找话题跟我聊了，我想应该是件好事吧。自从知道我要到上海之后，她都很主动地跟我打招呼  然后，就很自然的聊了起来。
更令我感到意外的是，在我第一天上班之前，我收到了新加坡的短讯，非常意外的，原来是她！祝福我开工大吉！哈哈。。。好一个意外的惊喜！
我想，她人现在应该是在台湾吧。。过两天应该会到香港去。原本想到香港找她，碰巧那个周末又是我的生日，很可惜，我的签证只允许我出入中国一次。要不然，我一定飞到香港去，过一个难忘的生日。
好了，该会去工作了。。。。。

2011-04-28T16:55:00.002+08:00

考试结束也有一段时间了。

没有跟她出去，的确有点可惜，也有点后悔。但因为时间没法配合 :(

我想，如果家里有事，每个人都会把心思和时间放在处理家里的事情吧。没有怪任何人，只能怪时间不配吧。。。

上个星期五，我已经没有办法了，跟她说了我在上海的工作。

星期一至今，她会主动和我聊天，也不知是因为我要到上海工作的关系吗，还是之前她不想打扰我读书？

我想，也应该是我结束这不清楚的暗恋吧。是暗恋吗？还是两个人虽然喜欢对方，但一直在猜对方在想什么的人？这，连我自己都没有办法回答。

如果是我一厢情愿，我愿意等，但请不要让我等太久。。。

如果是相爱的人，我就会辜负了她，她得等我回来。但我答应，我心中只有一个她。。

如果是完全不可能，我会到上海，让时间把一切冲谈。。。起码身边的东西都对我很新鲜，自己应该可以更快把她忘了。。。。

不想这么多了，希望自己可以在上海过得很好，玩得很开心！

当然，还得谢我的兄弟，徐振耀。要不是你每天讲笑话给我听，我早就承不住了。还有你不断的关心我的恋爱发展！谢了，兄弟

还有彦聪，给了我许多建议，让我懂得如何面对爱情，和我为什么会失败。

最后，吴莹丽，因为常常和你说话，所以感觉自己好像多了一个妹妹，一个自己。能够听我的心事而不会嘲笑我的人。谢了！

2011-04-18T10:02:00.002+08:00

仔细想想，去中国可能只是在逃避现实、或是在为自己失败后铺好路，免得自己感到尴尬。去上海也是半工作，半旅行！:) 迫不及待，恨不得马上飞到上海去！

2011-04-16T16:27:00.004+08:00

为什么一天让我充满希望，另一天又让我感到失望。。。

难道是工作太忙吗？嗨。。。

回想起当初跟她接触的时候，我还蛮肯定她是喜欢我。。但日子久了，似乎变成了单恋。。

我只感觉到自己好像很没用，身边的朋友都已经找到另一半了，而我还在人海中徘徊。我想，如果真的那么难的话，不如就算了吧。这应该是我准后的尝试，如果不行，就算了！个人生活也很自在啊。我想这是每个单身都会说的吧 :)

这种感觉很难过，但我想应该会慢慢淡化掉。可能在中国待一段时间，就会忘记了吧。。。

希望如此吧。。。。。。

2011-04-13T14:01:00.002+08:00

i think i am crazyyy! she msn-ed me and i couldnt stop smiling to myself! i am going nuts......................... :) :):) :):):) :):):):) :):):):):) :):):):):):) :):):):):):):)

2011-04-10T10:32:00.002+08:00

giving up soon! there is nothing much i can do if you dont reply my sms, dun appear online, dun appear on skype!

maybe you are avoiding me, but so be it.....

i realised all the past entries are all like what a secondary school student will post! maybe i am thinking too much, maybe i have not even been thinking, why would she be attacted to me?!?! ridiculous.... zomg...

i am so looking forward to going to china!

2011-04-04T15:33:00.002+08:00

march came and flew!

i rmb wishing her a happy march... 1 month ago.. although both of us thought the sms was weird..

on the verge of giving up again! maybe i am thinking too much.. maybe i was thinking too much from the start.. it must be a one way thingy.. not mutual at all..

told her i missed school becos i had a sore eye.. normally friends would even ask why and what happen and whether it got better.. but no, she didnt even ask me anything! nothing at all.. when i reached school on thurs, all my friends ask me about my eyes, if it had gotten better.. even the prof ask about it.. and advised me to go for make up lessons.. through all the concern of my friends, i came to realise... it might be a one way thing between me and her.. i have been thinking too much.. no more sms throughout that day!

todayyy..... i asked her if she wanted to watch 881 musical with me.. have to come out with a story that my neighbour gave me free tickets, fearing that she would not want to fork out so much money to watch the musical.. i know that she loves getai, hence i suggested doing something which she likes.. even so, she told me to watch with my family.. not giving up, i came out with yet another lie.. they are going during my exam period... this is wad she told me.. go with them ba, its only 2 hours.. after this, i didnt reply.. i am giving up..

its very difficult to plan for things or outings with her, and its more difficult to find out what she likes to do.. worse, she has to reject me times and times again!

its tiring.. i have other things to think of.. i am giving up.. yet people around me are questioning me about my gf.. i want to leave this place.. really hoping that i will secure my internship and fly to china..

2011-03-29T19:42:00.002+08:00

a happier man today!

today, she replied my sms almost instantly.. or maybe i should say within expected time? wells, not really expecting that i would receive any replies from her since weekend.. but yesterday seems like a change..

was trying my luck yesterday when i text her in the noon... she replied! not daring to sms too frequently, i lower the frequency.. this carries on till night.. i took a bus home.. when it stops at her house, i alight and decided to walk home.. she sms-ed that she is near home! i stopped.. things cant be so coincident, right? walking past her flat, i looked around.. AND i heard footsteps... i turned and i STARED... its her! i stoned for a second or two.. not believing what i just saw, i rubbed my eyes and looked again... the shape look exactly like her and the way she walks is really HER!

i walked on.. and waited at the carpark.. i didnt call her! up to now, i am still wondering why i didnt call her.. maybe cos i was on the verge of giving up? or maybe i thought that she might think that i am stalking her? arghh i dont know..

i continued my journey home slowlyy...

today is a happy day! we continued to sms and she said that office was busy which explains why she didnt reply me or sometimes she forgot to do so :( but never mind! i realised how a sms or a few sms can make so much difference to me!

oh wells, i hope everything will go on smoothly!

2011-03-26T01:07:00.002+08:00

got hooked on to blogging recently.. since i dun really share about myself to every and any one.. not even to my brothers or friends at times..

i really wish to sms you.. but the thought of sms-ing myself is putting me off..

everytime i sms you, i would tell myself not to expect any reply from you.. but before long, i would stare at my phone, hoping it would vibrate!

why do i have to 'sms myself'?

today, you replied! with a longer sms, telling me to enjoy my weekend! but somehow, i dont really feel very very happy on receiving the sms! somehow, i am used to not receiving any replies from you.. or have i given up hope? probably not, i still think of the possible things which we can do together..

i know you likes to stay home with your family.. i can do the same! as long as i have you in my heart and you have me in your heart.. but is that possible? or am i falling back to my old self.. finding my HER, but she has not found her HIM! :(

2011-03-24T19:18:00.003+08:00

felt a sudden urge to blog today!

it has been near one week.. that i have been sms-ing to myself..

why didnt you reply my sms? after 3 to 4 months of everday sms-ing and msn-ing.. i cannot do a day without a sms or msn from you...

i know i am not a very interesting person,

i know you have heard of all the jokes and riddles which i told you,

but i am trying to improve myself. trying to find more jokes and riddles to tell you so that it would not be so quiet every time we talk..

i dont mind wasting time entertaining you,

i dont mind waiting for you,

i dont mind sending you home,

i dont mind treating you dinner or lunch or movie...

i may be trying too hard.. but all i want is your attention.. i greeted you every morning, without fail since dec.. its ending mar now... 4 months.. without fail, i would sms or msn you, wishing you good morning.. you know how happy and delighted i am when i used to receive your morning sms when i am in the gym? i used to look forward to everyday, looking forward to your sms.. but now, i dread everyday.. i dread morning..

i cannot concentrate on anything i do...

keeping myself busy doesnt help at all.. everytime i try to read my text, my mind would be filled with you and your sms and your face...

keeping myself free doesnt really help also.. i would keep thinking of you when i am free.. thinking of the places which i can bring you if we were together.. but alas all my wishful thinking..

i dont expect you to say yes or have any actions.. afterall, i am not a very attractive guy.. all i ask for is some attention and a chance to be a good guy!

i havent even confess my feelings to you, although any idiots would have known that i have feelings for you.. do you not have a little bit of feelings for me? i choose not to believe that.. otherwise you wouldnt have replied me so instantly for the past 3 or 4 months..

why this sudden change in you? if you already have gotten someone, you could have let me know.. this feeling of uncertainty really sucks.. the feeling of 'waiting for nothing' is not much better..

i feel like giving up! but you shall be the last girl i shall fall for.. doubt i am going to wait for anyone else.. and doubt i am going to like anyone in the near future..

i always admire guys who can go home, hand in hand with their gf... i always admire guys who can go to movie with their gf.. have dinner with their gf.. bring their gf home to have dinner..

i feel miserable now.. no chocolate can make me any happier now.. all i need is time or a sms from you..

you arent the first one to treat me like this.. i should have gotten used to this feeling and shouldnt have wish for so much.. my bad for not learning my lessons.. i kind of hate myself now..

everyone said that i am mr nice and my future gf or wife would be damn fortunate.. i dont believe this anymore and i totally dread hearing this another time..

i miss you............. i want to go china in the summer.. to forget everything and start all over again... since i cannot get together with you, i wan to forget you.. i want to go somewhere far far away...

2011-02-23T17:32:00.002+08:00

if it is so difficult and painful to love, i would not have love in the first place..

2010-04-17T14:01:00.001+08:00

1) 3 (not sure)

2) 5

3) 2

4) 2

5) 3

6) 2, 4, 5 (either 2 or 3)

7) 1, 3

8) False

9) 2

10)

11)

12)

13) 1

14)

15)

16)

17) 1, 3, 5

18) B, c, e, a, d

19) 2

20) 4

21) 1, 4, 5

22) 2, 4

23) 2 ( I think so)

2009-11-24T10:48:00.001+08:00

"With You"

I need you boo, (oh)

I gotta see you boo (hey)

And there're hearts all over the world tonight,

Said the hearts all over the world tonight [x2]

[Verse 1]

Hey! Little mama,

Ooh, you're a stunnerHot..

little figure,Yes, you're a winner

And I'm so glad to be yours,

You're a class all your own

And..Oh, little cutie

When..you talk to me

I swear..the whole world stops

You're my sweetheart

And I'm so glad that you are mine

You are one of a kind and..

[Bridge:]

You mean to me

What I mean to you and..

Together baby,

There is nothing we won't do'cause if I got you,

I don't need money,

I don't need cars,

Girl, you're my all.And..

[Chorus:]

Oh!I'm into you,

And girl,

No one else would do,

'cause with every kiss and every hug,

You make me fall in love,

And now I know I can't be the only one,

I bet there heart's all over the world tonight,

With the love of their life who feels..

What I feel when I'm

With you [x5]

Girl..

With you [x5]

[Verse 2]

Oh girl!

I don't want nobody else,

Without you, there's no one left then,

You're like Jordans on Saturday,

I gotta have you and I cannot wait now,

Hey! Little shawty,

Say you care for me,

You know I care for you,

You know...that I'll be true,

You know that I won't lie,

You know that I would try,T

o be your everything..yeah..

[Bridge:]

'cause if I got you,

I don't need money,

I don't need cars,Girl, you're my all.

And..

[Chorus]

With you [x5]

Oh..

With you [x5]

Yeah Heh..

[Bridge 2]

And I..Will never try to deny,

that you're my whole life,

'cause if you ever let me go,

I would die..

So I won't front,

I don't need another woman,

I just need your all and nothing,

'cause if I got that,

Then I'll be straight

Baby, you're the best part of my day

I need you boo,I gotta see you boo

And there're hearts all over the world tonight,

Said the hearts all over the world tonight [x2]

Woo Oh.. Yeah

They need it boo,

They gotta see their boo,

Said the hearts all over the world tonight,

Hearts all over the world tonight [x2]

[Chorus]

With you [x5]

Girl..

With you [x5]Oh..

2009-05-08T15:16:00.002+08:00

dinner with my boss and colleague yesterday.

florence's farewell. dinner was at jumbo at clark quay.

great seafood, but the portion seems small to me, which was some what suitable in yesterday's situation where we only managed to have our dinner-supper at 9 plus 10 PM!

had a great time laughing and catching up with boss's shifu or master as she called him. he is a feng shui master, who of course help people see their feng shui:) and to me, i think he is very very zun! the first thing he ask me is: do you always fall sick when you are young? i looked at him with my eyes wide open! how does he know? its true, when i was young, seeing doctors is just like having a meal to me. maybe something like every alternate days, i will have to make a trip to see the doc, i think my family doctor must have made quite a bit of money from my mother also! :) or do i have a sickly face? that he can tell i am always sick when i am young?

out of my curiosity, i asked him, how about my studies? will i be able to graduate from smu? he looked at me again. my heart stop beating for a while. then he told me. not a problem la. lady luck is with me! haha, i guess i do not have much brains to begin with, luck is the only thing i can rely on? but wells, at least i can grad, whether luck or not doesnt matter.

then my colleagues ask him how is my love life, what kind of gf i will have!! he think think think for a long time. i was thinking, is he going to say that i am going to be a monk?? then he says, i will get a fierce wife! haha, or maybe i should say a wife who controls a lot of things? another question pop out from my colleague, what size? tall short fat thin. he told me, a bit round! wells, i really dont know whether to believe him or not. i believed such things since i was young and i still believe. but somewhat this description...........................

the rest of the time was chatting about janice prince charming. master told her that she will get a japanese bf within 3 weeks to one month and she will get a lightning wedding, by the end of the year!! shocking. yes master even told her what to do, to be able to meet this japan guy! haha. really a night full of laughter.

somehow, i believe such feng shui things since i was young, interesting now that i came into contact with it at this age, with a different perspective......

2009-04-27T09:56:00.002+08:00

weekend:)

somehow my weekend was spent or wasted.................

saturday morning, went to the library to borrow a couple of books for my children class at night, went for a swim:) followed by getting lunch for my brothers, and went down to fgs for a lesson at 3pm, lessons at the night as usual for children class.

sunday woke up at 7, to fetch my bro and mum out. sent mum to ngee ann city as she had some volunteery work to do. came back home, had my breakfast, bathed and went to fgs for meeting. lunched at fgs. came back home and went out with dad and bro again, this time to peninsula to buy bball shoes for my bro. after that, went to ngee ann again, to pick up my mum for dinner. after dinner, went home and laze at home, in front of the tv..........

wells, my life seems to be occupied some how, without deliberate planning, but somehow i am occupined.. i guess with this kind of lifestyle, its better for me to stay single:) as i dont see any excess time i have...

2009-04-24T17:06:00.000+08:00

got this call when i was working the other day.

this lady who happened to be a ex client of my boss in 2003 got a call from the court! claiming that she has been caught for washing black money. and asked her to attend a hearing in court 3!! this scared her immensely.

her immediate action was to call us, as we are a law firm.

after boss heard the story, told her to make a police report, as we are unable view the hearing dates and details of dates which are more than one week away.

soon after i got a call from her again. she did went to the police and she was the 8th person in bedok to make such a report. the 7th person who made the report was there also!

this is a scam! people, when you receive such call from court, pls be very sure not to disclose your details to them!! unless you are very sure they are really calling from the court! be very careful..

anw, just a side note, FGS is in need of usher on 9 may and 10 may, for vesak day celebration, anyone wants to volunteer your service?

2009-04-08T13:14:00.003+08:00

tired.. nearly fell asleep standing in the mrt two days ago..
slept at 10 plus yesterday and the result: feeling so much more energetic today:)
okays, got to go and finish my work now.......

2009-03-23T17:54:00.001+08:00

took this quiz on fb and found it so accurate..

Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children.Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.

2009-03-23T16:57:00.002+08:00

busy week!

practically every day of the week i am at fgs, less monday, thursday and sunday.

monday, the fgs is closed, so no need to go down, thursday i have dinner so no choice cannot go down. sunday, i am just too lazy.

at this rate, i can become a monk~~ haha

anyways, finally the tertiary camp is over and it went smoothly:) not much of disruption and the participants were great! proactive and are of a certain standard, which i am definitely far from it.

anw, i did learn a lot from this camp, given my little knowledge on buddhism. certain things are too chim for me to understand, and i did try to stay awake! mixing around with the students, realised that there are still many youths who have great interest in buddhism! great sign to see. hopefully more of them will come to fgs often, so i can relax:)

children class again this coming week! need to prepare for vesak day performance..

work is so relaxed these 2 days, cos boss is not in office. so everything is done at a slower and more relaxed pace. happy. but this happiness wont last long. tmr she will be back!!

okays, nothing much to blog about also:) take care people..

2009-03-06T10:41:00.003+08:00

it has been such a long long time since my last entry.

i am getting really busy.. not sure whether its a good sign or not.

every saturday, i am down for children class in the night, which means i need to do my preparation works in the week. sometimes i really dont know what i should do for class that week! the class i am taking is really challenging.

out of the 18 kids in my class, 14 are guys!! and majority of the kids are new students. that means i got lots of fundermental work to do! and i need to manage the boys in the class, its indeed true that boys are really more active!! in the class, i got a boy who is hyperactive, one who likes to fight, one who has a artificial eye which can drop off any time, one girl who has to stick with her maid, one girl who needs her cousin to be around less she will cry and i got a pair of identical twins!! how challenging!!! and best of all, they are only 5 to 6 years old!!

anyways, got lessons with them for 3 weeks already, after every lessons i will be practically no voice, and its only until last week did the rest of the teachers and shi fu realised how challenging my class is!!

after that lesson, i received a sms from xiu zhen lao shi, telling me to jia you! was really touched that day, tears streamed into my eyes, none of the other teachers or even the oic say anything encouraging to me, only her! i dont need anyone to pity me! thanks to her, my confidence went up, am sure i am able to handle these 18 kids well!!

busy busy busy. not only with that, but have to be busy with other things like tertiary camp! tons of admin work waiting for me to do!! why is there always not enough time??

enough of temple stuff:) work @ office. boss hasnt been really in good mood since her return to singapore from manila dance competition. almost every day she will scream and shout. my colleague has been thinking of resign-ing, hope she wont, if not i will die!! keeping my fingers crossed!

been spending quite a bit recently. anw, thanks zy for organising the dinenr at sushi teh:) nice outing since we havent met up for so long! nice nice, had such a great time laughing and laughing that night!!

2009-02-12T23:29:00.001+08:00

Tertiary Camp 2009
extending invitation to all who are in university, poly or waiting to enter uni:)
feel free to contact me for any queries.

2009-01-02T15:31:00.002+08:00

been a while since i last updated. the last post was before i flew off to taiwan.
taiwan, good place. was winter when i went there. totally different feeling and experience. since i have never been to a winter country before. learnt quite a lot of stuffs, and i believe i had matured and grew while learning at taiwan. learnt about how to manage a class better and how to make a lesson become alive! such knowledge are useful, since ven asked me to take a class officially this year. hopefully what i have learnt will be able to put to good use.

after i came back, i went off to KL for shopping with aik, cong and hong. stupid shun! cannot come with us. haha. anyways, nice trip. totally alone and got the chance to walk around the city, trying out the monorail, trying out the food there, like little penang and the roadside store. really an experience, when the people there only knows how to speak cantonese and i can only speak a little. we are all actually like dumb people when we met them! and bargaining price is also a new experience, leng zai! i realised, one must not be too soft hearted when bargaining!
okays, now back to work already...... have lots of things to do at temple!!! shall update again when i have time...

2008-12-09T15:52:00.002+08:00

okays, finally got this little bit of time to blog..

got a job at a law firm through my neighbours, and started working immediately after the interview, woo thats really fast.. lots of typing to do, which cause my eyes to be very very tired at the end of the day.

wells after working for one week only, i am going to relax a bit. going to taiwan tomorrow, so i wont be back till next wed! dont call me or anything!!

after my taiwan, i will be going to KL with jc guys, cong, shun, aiky and hong! haha, hope i can buy some good stuffs or bargain!!

2008-11-24T10:38:00.002+08:00

back in singapore again.
went to malaysia during the weekend. auntie's birthday, totally last minute decision of my dad to go back and help celebrate. partly to give face?
nothing much happen, just the normal. catching up with aunties and cousins. but the shocking thing, is that i happen to meet tan yan cong in that small kampong! didnt expect to meet anyone i know in that small kampong. wells..
met up with zhihong on thurs. kept on saying that i changed a lot since we parted from jc, says that i become more vain.. is that supposed to be good?
met up with weilong, yilin and kenneth for some badminton after that. playing with weilong is indeed tiring, school term is of a higher standards! my body hurts so much the next day.
wells, nothing much to update these few days also.........

2008-11-18T17:46:00.002+08:00

i am back from penang.
this time, went to penang with a different objective. went with the children dhrama class kids. about 24 of them and 9 other teachers.
was quite worried when we first set off, worried that things will not turn out well and afraid that we might lose any kids or any kids might get into any mischaps.
wells, luckily it all went well.
i guess being a teacher, its very important to be able to pick up things fast, we have to pick up the latest games that they are playing so that we can communicate with them. i ended up learning how to play some hand games, those that we played at kindergaton, really bring back lots of memories.
and being a teacher with them, i have to really eat very very fast. when the food come, i have to help them get the food to let them eat, afterwhich then i will start. halfway through, they would have finish and want to go to the washroom, have to stop and bring them there. by the time i come back, its about time to go off!! phew, its was so rush.
the kids i met were really adorable, maybe its just because i like kids ba. there is this guy, i think he is primary 4 already, but whenever he gets off the bus and i hold out my hands, he will come automatically to hold my right hand, think he is afraid of being lost at penang. after a couple of days, there is another guy who start to stick to me like a magnet, until i couldnt possibly do anything.
wells, happy but tired after the trip. probably time for me to start looking for a job to entertain myself and get myself busy. i am beginning to miss the kids......

2008-11-10T15:19:00.001+08:00

finally, tmr is coming!
the long awaited 11 nov is coming at last.
somehow, enlistment seems yesterday, unknowingly time flies and 1 year 10 months fly just like that. i dont know how i am going to sleep tonight...

2008-11-05T21:29:00.003+08:00

6 more days, to be exact. to my freedom-ord.
thinking about ord these few days, realised that ord is not that a big deal, as an nsman was telling me the other day, while doing duty. rod is the real deal. for those who do not know the terms, rod means no more returning to camp for any reservist or ict.
after ord, there are still regulations that must be followed, else the consequences will be the same as a nsf-DB! ippt still must be cleared, duties must still be done, training must be cleared and stuffs like that.
actually, being a nsf is not a bad thing, now that i think of it. there is always instructions to be followed, as long as you follow them, nothing will go wrong. whereas, after ord, some will be at a loss of what to do. there is simply no one out there to tell you what you need to do next. wells, thats the challenge faced by some of us.
but i guess, its quite similar across all nsf- either holiday or study or work. there is nothing much a youth like us can do.
thinking of it, going to tekong seems like yesterday or maybe just a month ago. wearing a red rebok tee, jeans and a pair canvas shoe and carrying a orange backpack! the scene seems like yesterday only. somehow the 9 weeks flew pass before i know it. pop from tekong.
went to cnb to be a sea soldier, still remember meeting up with elvin and eston. took the bus to cnb. looking so lost with a field bag and duffel bag, thinking that we can throw away our no 4. since we are in a naval base. thinking that no 3 will be our new uniform:) but was disappointed somehow. poc from the course soon.
posted to platoon 2, lucky for me, somehow i still prefer platoon2:) did duty at land side, was selected to be a coxswain to drive rhibs. after batch 10 went off, stayed at romeo permanently. till 11 batch going off for operation, ic told me to take over. took over and was the ic for 4.5 months? around there. handed down to yet another relunctant ic.
was asked to take charge of 34 ojts. duty standby off off was indeed shiok, but things got to be done, has to be done. stressed at times esp when deadlines are near. worried for the trainees, for their ops. finally, they turn ops without anything happening.
ord is just 6 days away.
think i have really matured a lot during these 1 year 10 months. especially the last few months when i was the ic and took ojt. learned a lot about pr and how to handle things. different perspectives. wells, in conclusion, was glad and relieved about my whole ns life. it went smoothly for me. luckily for me, i was not in the wrong place at the wrong time.
finally, this 1 year and 10 months is ending for me... wondering if it is good or bad...

couple of days back, was asked what is my sch resolution when uni starts for me.
wells, thinking of, probably is to get good results?? as everyone also wants it.
get a job before i grad?? internship?? yes its hard to get a job nowadays.
change my status from evergreen to red?? heard from my friend the other day during a gathering that in uni, maritial status is as follows: evergreen-never had a relationship before. green- have a relationship before, but single at the moment. amber- complicated. red- attached.
hopefully, my status will change?? ;)

i guess thats all from me now, thinking of getting myself a shade tomorrow:) time to spend money again!!

2008-10-22T23:11:00.002+08:00

back to blog again.
anyways, i just scratch the new car!! oh my god. after sending my bro back to camp on monday night, was parking into this parking lot which was beside this pillar. normally, i would park very close to the pillar so that other cars will have lesser chance to even touch my car since there is such a big space between us. didnt notice that i was too close to the pillar and there it went. argh!!
ok, that apart. i wont be going back to camp to mount duty anymore! with the help of kenneth and my beloved wisdom tooth, i dont need to do any more duty=)
ok, today went to orchard road to have amazing race planned by pc and ps. wells, was posted to be one of the station ic at far east plaza. what a good place to be at. i spent my whole morning and afternoon looking at shirts and shopping;) that apart, was happy with some section for showing their teamwork and spirit. yups, quite a few groups show that. however, there are just a few individuals who chose to be the black sheep and decide to show totally no interest hence affecting the spirit of the whole section and everyone not willing to take part. come on la, even a blind man can see that pc and ps spend a lot of time to map out the whole thing for today. true la, pc going to ord, of cos he has lots of time, but ever wonder why he is doing this instead of being with his girlfriend?? it all boils down to attitude. rather pissed with those people who dont even make an effort to show some enthusiasm. wasting everyone's time. anyways, 3 days off is very attractive to a nsf! i will really fight and run just to get off, cos its easy job. i guess i really wont mind doing the brazilian wax even just to get off, afterall, everything is FREE!!
anyways, just realised that my favourite batch of coxswain is batch 15. not that i trying to suck anyone, or the other way round. no point for them to do so now, even no point for me to do so. but i am happy to see that batch 15 are so united and most of all, they know what is gratitude. wells, happy for them. they will go a longer way than the others. shall not say too much bad stuffs about others here, in case they see it. but i only can say that batch 13 is united but careless and arrogant. batch 14 is not united but they are more careful and hardworking. hence batch 15 is still my favourite:)
but i guess batch 15 got a lot more to learn! so, jia you ba:)
that should be all from me for the time being:) take care!!

2008-10-15T10:20:00.002+08:00

finally, another batch of sea soldiers are ready for operation! toc was yesterday. everything went smoothly:)
really got to thank all those who made it successful:) although they wont get to see this blog, but still thanks
was a bit reluctant yesterday, but somehow all good things got to end, huh? its time for them to add on to the manpower for ops and they should contribute to their respective platoon. and its also time for me to spend more time to think about my future!
kinda relieved now, no longer a romeo ic, neither a ojt instructor, feel a bit empty and a sudden loss of what to do, but the feeling of being able to sleep properly and not having to fear any phone ringing in the middle of the night is great:)
shall start looking for a job soon, so after my taiwan trip, i can start working immediately and earn some money, dont feel like taking money from my parents during my uni life!

2008-10-13T22:51:00.002+08:00

alrighto!
back for some updates.
halfway through oct. my ojt guys are going to turn ops soon! tomorrow will be the ceremony. wells, kinda find them a great bunch of people, though they were a bit overboard at times, not knowing when to behave themselves, but they were a bunch of fun loving peeps. kinda sad that i am not able to put them all in the platoon that they wanted:( and also i guess i wont have much time with them left, in the time to come, considering that i will be having my MA, and alsomy clearance is coming up, but ord is more impt, right?? haha.
anyways, i have decided to go to penang and taiwan after i ord! looking forward to the trips! hopefully, i get to enjoy myself and learn some new stuffs and also make new friends!

2008-10-02T17:05:00.002+08:00

finally, October is here. cant wait for November to come though.
anyways, currently my jobscope has a slight change, not mounting duty for the time being, but instead taking trainees. one of the instructors for the new guys who will be mounting duty with us. quite a relax job but there are certain requirements, like not to be too nice and friendly to the trainees and etc etc.
will be going back to duty after their trainee phase is over. but i guess i wont be doing much duty also, due to my wisdom tooth extraction, but one thing for sure is that i wont be doing duty at romeo already! a relief to me, in fact. not that romeo is a very stressed station, but the people there are not very cooperative, especially recently.
wells, going to penang after i ord! going with the kids:) looking forward to the penang trip. as to the taiwan trip in dec, wells, i still have to see how ba.
was looking through friends' pictures at friendster and facebook. wondering why they can change their girlfriends so quickly, didnt contact them for some time, and before i knew it, their partners change again. wow! for me, my mind is still stuck with her. guess its just my personality ba.
for now, thats all:)

2008-09-07T23:55:00.003+08:00

alrights, back.

this weekend was kind of crazy and busy for me! oh wells, not forgetting the hectic and disappointing duty week.

duty week. already counting down to my last duty cycle. however, realised that the standards of all coxswains are dropping and it is tremendous and obvious. i was wondering what had i not done to prevent such things from happening. is it my fault that i didnt teach them well or are they the cause of it, not learning everything?? haiz, i guess it mainly my fault. always doing everything by myself, to ensure that nothing goes wrong, but didnt give them enough chance for hand on. i really regret it.

a big sorry to my new ic. i didnt teach them well, resulting in a big burden on you. really apologetic to you. but i believe you will be a better ic than me, having seen 2 ic's totally different working method. hope that you are able to keep the good stuffs and change the bad practice that we had. jia you, i chose you simply because you are able to do it and be a good ic, bring romeo to a greater height and you will be a good helper to msg and sir.

saturday. went fishing with hk, alvin, zd and sk. wells, changi beach is not a very good place to fish, it seems, never mind, next time i shall rent a boat and we go out to fish, ya?

afternoon, rush down to fky for meeting, and in the night got lesson at fky. oic is not around, hence there seems to be a rushing around for everything. wells, seems like oic is of some use, huh?

wells, another hectic week shall start for me tomorrow. havent even finish handing over my romeo ic role, yet on the other hand, have to start to learn rope to being a ojt (on job training) instructor. wells, loads of work to be done, but i am sure i can do it well. jia you!

2008-08-23T22:52:00.002+08:00

being blogging quite a bit these few days. just have the urge to blog. no particular reasons.

anyways, went to watch fireworks with my parents and bro yesterday! beautiful fireworks! made up for my not being able to catch fireworks during national day! its really awesome:) oh ya, did i tell you i met yuehong? one of my very respected seniors, one with quality and skills that is so very rare to find nowadays.

supposed to meet up shun, cong and hong for swimming and lunch today, but thanks to the wet weather, no one is willing to come out! in the end, met up hong for lunch and some catching up! great to meet up some jc friends after so long to find that everyone is still going on alrights!

okays, going for my wisdom tooth extraction soon, going to fix a date to get rid of them. will be painful, i guess, but since its free, why not?? instead of pulling them out in future, when i need to pay for them! going to smoke out some duties some days, just to get rid of wisdom tooth! but i guess that will have to wait till i pass down my ic role. alrights, had this person in mind to hand down to him, though he seem relunctant to take over me, but for the good and welfare of all coxswains and for the better of romeo, i think i will still hand down to him. guess i need to explain to everyone and him why that is my decision. haiz.

today went to temple for lesson. first time having to teach a class. in the past, i was just the assistant, a simple job which i just have to assist the teacher, make sure the students behave and listen to teacher. but today, had to teach a class on my own, although i was assign a assistant, but she was new also! 2nd lesson for her! well, new experience, i must say. probably next year, i can be a teacher on my own! wells, looking forward to that:)

alrights, thats all i got for today, glad that tomorrow wont have to go for AHM (army half marathon). cant imagine me having to complete 21 km!!

2008-08-21T22:07:00.003+08:00

i have decided. i will carry on my duty as a romeo ic, till the day i step down. shall put all my heart and soul in trying to groom all the upcoming new coxswains till the day i step down as romeo ic. maybe like this, i will not live with any regrets and my ns life will be a fruitful one. not sure whether i will succeed or not, but you never know if you never try:)

guess it hard for me not to care too much.

2008-08-21T21:38:00.002+08:00

another week passed. started off well, till near the end of it.

started to think a lot. whether i am doing things that are extra. sometimes, i just feel that things that i do is unneccessary and extra. things that will never be appreciated by others. when the air con is cold, cover blanket for others, when the weather is hot, ask them to drink up. doing more things myself such that others can relax and do their own things. why am i making myself so tired when such things are never taken note or appreciated. haiz. making sure that everything at my station is well taken care of. when officers are coming, initiated to tidy up the whole place, cleaning up everything, tiring myself with such misc stuffs where everyone else thinks that what i am doing is redunctant. i guess, something must really happen before everyone will realise that such things can happen.

that goes the same for my buddy, doing so much things, just to make sure that everyone at sea side will be protected from officers. making sure that everyone will have their weekends free. sometimes, even having to go against our own batch of friends. i guess such things will never be appreciated. haiz.

sometimes, i feel that i am a failure. up to now, my people still unable to do simple chores. the most simple chore that i can find at my station! if only i did teach them properly in the past, such things will not happen today. i guess i rely too much on my junior batches to teach the newest coxswains already. if i did not rely on them so much, i would have taken them personally, and such mistakes will never be committed. haiz. its all my fault! that coxswains standard are dropping.

i guess in future, i should just care about things that concern me and my station. as long as i do not get an extras or confinement, i think i should be contented. afterall, who will care if i care about others so much? nobody wants to do anything even if i say anything. nobody even wants to move or correct their mistakes after i mention it. so, just do things that are in my jobscope. the rest, just heck. probably in a couple of duty cycles more, i will step down and things that happen at romeo will not and never concern me again!

feeling quite emo today, so dont bother about me. i guess i will be alrights tomorrow, after one night's sleep.

2008-08-13T22:44:00.003+08:00

just got screwed in the afternoon.

for mistakes that i made,

for things that i missed out,

for things that i never ever thought that could happen,

for things that i never do,

worse of all, for mistakes that i didnt commit.

i guess, i have to be more careful in future, open my eyes bigger to take note of the surroundings!

tomorrow going to start another duty week. time pls start flying!!

2008-08-11T20:21:00.002+08:00

back. long time since i come here to leave an entry.

having lots of different feelings this month. no idea why, but whenever i see him taking a puff, i feel disappointed and felt cheated. but why?? i am not related to him in anyway, but why do i care so much? probably cos i just dont wan to see another guy turn to smoking? i just hate myself for not being able to do anything to prevent bl from smoking. now its cs. is smoking really so satisfying? i just dont get it, why do i always feel so bad and disappointed when i see him take a puff? i am in no position to comment on anyone's personal life. initially, thought he was just a social one, but today saw him with a pack, i guess he is not a social anymore. felt a sudden ache in my heart. maybe i am just being emotional. i guess i need to learn how to let go and not care about certain things too much.

wells, getting used to life in ns now, being an ic is not an easy task, but it does make me learn lots of things. getting to know all 16 coxswains well is not an easy task, but i am sure i will be able to do it. all 16 of them are just like my brothers, or part of me, it does hurt me much to see someone sad or being neglected. sometimes, i do feel the pain when i scold them. regreted scolding them after i just scolded them. felt that i was too much at times. but its always too late. but i guess they will never understand me, thinking that i am always trying to pick on them, making life difficult for them? yups, no need to tell me, but i can sense it myself. haiz. not easy being an ic, being too relaxed, probably things will never be done. being strict, people will start t hate you.

okays, on a lighter note, i went shopping!! spent near to 100 bucks in just a weekend shopping! i wanna go shopping more!!

2008-07-03T17:42:00.002+08:00

sometimes i still think of her.

sometimes i still wonder what she is doing.

sometimes i still hope to see her at familar places.

is she just a crush? or do i really have feelings for her?

at times, i simply cant decide for myself.

anw, long time no blog. things have changed a lot! dont wish to remind myself of the unhappy stuffs that has happen throughout the last month. but i must say that i have grown quite a bit since i become a romeo ic. it has been 2 months since i taken over. time flies. things changed. i only hope things changed for the better not for the worst, while i am in office!

haiz, life goes on, whether you like it or not. look on the bright side and be more positive, i guess thats the only way to last me till nov!

2008-05-22T16:43:00.001+08:00

saw this relatively interesting poster on facebook, done by van. laughing to myself. funny.

anw, 10A, class gathering on 30 may, marche @vivo. hope you guys can make it:)

2008-05-21T09:31:00.002+08:00

back.

happy birthday to me. left the teenager stage relunctantly. now twenty. bleahs.

thanks to those who wished me. whether its in advance, on the day itself or belated, still many thanks:) and thanks to my buddies who celebrated my birthday for me. kenneth, guan kwee, wei long, yi lin, ivan, hoak kiang, chong wei, yew mun and wei ting. thanks guys for the dinner and presents:) anw, the dinner is great! love the prawns:) thanks guys!

last duty week, the ex ic, yb left the platoon. and i took over. don't know whether its for the good or bad. good in the sense that no one will be there to control me, i need not be the puppet of someone already. good also in the sense that there will not be anyone to disturb people at romeo. however, it has since become very very quiet and the people are getting a bit out of hands. things are not done in the proper way, and a couple of accidents happen already. hope that next duty week will be better and my aim is that i don't need to make any phone calls to any officers. otherwise i will change myself to become stricter and fiercer to prevent any accidents from happening. haiz.

vesak day. phew finally its over. was on voluntary work throughout the weekend and monday. stood for near 12 hours each day! it was worse than doing duty back at base! totally tire out each day and felt my legs are breaking anytime soon. anw, glad that it was finally over!

went to east coast park for a run yesterday! the weather was super duper hot and humid. was glad that i managed to finish my 8 km run! the timing was not as good as two weeks ago, might be due to the hot weather? hope that my next run will be better!

on off today! didn't go back to camp for the whole standby week;) if only all the standby weeks are like that, i will simply be happy!! okays, guess that's all i have, probably going for a swim later! the weather is simply killing me!!

2008-05-03T13:21:00.003+08:00

another week past. a hectic week for me, and indeed not an easy week.

tried to be firm. but turn out to be rude and impolite instead. guess its just how i handle things and my emotions. a good leader should be able to play hard and work hard at the same time, and be able to be firm when times call for it and be relaxed and joke around when its time to do so.

scolded them for not doing things properly, but didnt realised that everyone makes mistakes and a second chance could easily be given to them. haiz. guess i upset and disappoint quite a number of people, apologetic about that, shall work hard to improve myself.

i dont know if i am able to be as good an ic as yb or kh or even k9, but i promised i will work hard to improve myself, my ops and my pr. not only that, i will work hard to improve on all the others' ops also, especially the new guys! thats my aim as an ic. shall work towards it, no idea what is the results, but just hope that i will ord feeling happy that i have done a good job in my ic days.

one last duty week with my upperstudy around, before he goes for his operation in iraq! jia you to k12, ck and gk also! all our upperstudy are going off soon!

2008-04-23T19:37:00.002+08:00

back. being quite a while since i last post an entry.

had a couple of days of rhibs training. its just getting interesting, when i was told it will be the last week of rhibs training, which means, today is the last day, till july.

anyways, was told by sir that we will be playing chase the rabbit yesterday. was a bit shocked with the two boats that we were using. boat 2 was furiously fast and boat 10 was much slower. tested the hull when sending them back on monday and realised that boat 2 can easily overtake boat 10. pointed out this fact to sir, which he commented, was not an issue. however, when we were out at sea, realised what sir said was true! yes, it is true that boat 10 is slower than boat 2. but, boat 10 is better at cutting corners! boat 2 will create a sense of insecurity when making a turn, and hence the driver has to slow down and make a turn, but boat 10 can turn nicely, hence boat 10 will be able to keep a distance from boat 2 by simply making lots of turns:)

this makes me think about something else. initially, wanted to condemn some of the juniors. however, after the incident, decided to give them another chance. to show it to me and others that they are not a rotten apple. because, i believe everyone is good at something, probably you are good at attitude, but not boat handling, probably you are good at boat handling, but not operations knowledge. decided to reconsider all of them again. hopefully my batch mates and seniors will see this, and understand what i mean, esp gk and yb, but i doubt they will see this:(

okays, thats all for today. going for duty tomorrow and after dismounting next thursday, will have a range on friday. bleahs. life goes on. counting down to 2 more duty cycles before i take over and become romeo IC!

2008-04-10T13:27:00.003+08:00

supposed to have a live range today, however it was cancelled yesterday. totally last minute notification. and was very surprised as live range is always considered to be a big event and seldom will be cancelled. anyways, was glad that we have one day of off. this week is rather relax for us, monday and tuesday are off, wednesday was half day off, only went back in the morning for IMT and today was off also. wells, if only life was like that for all standby week, i wont mind having to stay in for 7 days straight. :)

nothing much else to say, going to start duty tomorrow.

2008-04-08T13:48:00.002+08:00

back again.

went out with my section mates yesterday:) nice outing, we should have more of these, but we did spend quite a bit. went for a dim sum buffet. tried every dish that is shown on the menu and ate quite a lot. was totally bloated when leaving the restaurant. personally think that its quite worth it, considering that everyone paid around 16 dollars and spent more than 2 hours in the restaurant:)

after that, went to marina for k-session! first session for one of my friend though. enjoyed myself although i didnt know all the songs that were sung, but still its the company of friends who made things more fun and enjoyable:)

have to book in again tonight, for tomorrow's IMT. hopefully it will end early and can get to book out in the noon. guess i have to book in again on wednesday night. due to the live range on thursday. luckily there is no night shoot on thursday, which means that we might be able to finish shooting by afternoon:)

gambatte:)

2008-04-04T14:07:00.002+08:00

back after another week of duty.

one month ago, my station IC told me that he will be handing the IC role to me after he left. didnt took much notice of what he says, as he will only be leaving in september, which is so so so far away from now.

however, before we start our duty last week, he made an announcement in front of the crowd, he says: i might be going for EX OBO, and the next IC will be Elton. for that one moment, i was shocked! i never expect me to be taking over him so quickly. instead of september, he will be leaving our platoon the latest by june, as the exact date is not confirmed. of course, there lies a huge possibility that he might leave our platoon by may, which means he will start to hand down things next week or so. i am totally unprepared. furthermore, he instructed me not to be too nice to the newer guys and must scold them!! this is so unlike of me. do you normally see me scolding people?? wells, i guess i have got loads to learn. my PR skills, my ops, my boat handling and lots of things. where should i start first?? sighs. i understudied him for one whole week of 7 days. didnt learnt much as what he taught is quite elementary and are things which i already knows.

a sense of satisfaction and yet disappointment. shall blog about this another time. when the time is ripe.

nothing much to say, guess next monday and tuesday is off and leave respectively, unless there is any unexpected and unforseen changes, which i hope is not the case! thursday is live firing at nee soon camp again. guess i have to stay in on wed night, thur night and start to do duty on friday. sighs, this is the life that we are living!

2008-03-13T13:30:00.002+08:00

one month since i last came here.

quite a bit of things happen.

lots of ranges this few months. lets see, 2 in jan, 1 in feb and one more coming up in march! woohoo.. just hope that the range will not last till the night. other than that, i have no other complains about having to stay in and things like that.

wells, duty has been rather slack recently, although i must say that i learnt wuite a lot since batch 10 ord, cos we are 2nd in line in seniority. hence there are lots of things which must be done and learnt by us. happy about it:) of course, this being said, we have to bear more responsibilty and have to learn to do certain things without the presence of batch 11, just to practise the situation when batch 11 ord in aug and sept.

obo, an exercise in june. affected some of the batch 11 guys, causing them to ord earlier. hence certain roles and responsibilities need to be handed down earlier than expected. wonder if i am going to be affected. either way, i am going to be affected with the ic role, its either in may or aug. lets hope its may, where the responsibility is not so huge, but i doubt so. just accept whatever that comes??

as i said, duty was quite relax recently. practically had nothing much to do. hence risk, mahjong, psp games and dvd became our good buddies. risk in the morning and afternoon if there are enough people, if not, dvd and psp games. mahjong kicks in the evening after the duty officer finishes his round. see, this is the kind of life we lead and the kind of life we wish we had;) anw, this is to compensate us for having to stay in 7 days in one shot. its just like having a field camp once in a fortnight:( somehow, we have settled down and people tend not to have so much complains about it already, at least for my batch of us:)

today is an OFF! hurray:) anyways, i think i really need to brush up on my standing broad jump to get myself a silver for ippt. after which i can get myself promoted to CFC, which means increment in pay:)

nothing much to blog about le. till the next time i come:)

2008-02-12T10:56:00.000+08:00

新年快乐！在此祝贺大家万事如意。

this chinese new year, isnt the best of all. was in camp doing my duty. the feeling wasnt exactly great, especially when you thought of your family members and your loved ones, outside visiting relatives and having a happy time. but i must say that this is unavoidable especially in my unit. the only bright side, i can look at is that this will be the only time in my lifetime, and i wont be doing the same thing next year, unlike those batches after me, especially 13 and 14, as i heard next chinese new year will be as early as in january.

thinking of deferring my national service this year, so that i can start my uni life in 2008. wondering if this is a wise choice to make. was prompt by my aunt to do so. guess i have to weigh the pros and cons for doing so. pro is i will be faster than those of my batch guys and get a certificate earlier than them. but con is that i will be so lonely when i return to complete my national service. let nature take it course:)

hope and disappointment seems to be separated by a thin line. they say, the higher your hope, the harder you fall, the greater the disappointment.

why is it that people love giving me hope, making me think so greatly of myself, after which i get all disappointed again. i am beginning to hate this kind of feelings, for this is not the first time i am having it. lesson learnt, never to be naive and believe whatever people say, no matter their rank, position or appointment. only believe in black and white.

going to celebrate friend's birthday later:) but before that, think i might go for a swim and pop down to bugis to buy some clothes;) this chinese new year seems so quiet for me:(

2008-01-29T14:38:00.000+08:00

craps.. lots of things happen last week!! apart from the ord-ing personnel.. lots of other things happen too.. officiers coming all of a sudden and stunning things!! he comes in and went out with 4 PSPs.. felt sorry for those guys who lost their psp just like that and also feel a bit apologetic, as i totally forgot to keep the psp.. all these happen on wednesday.. within the short period of time, lots of things happen.. hard to explain here also.. bleahs..

after all these happen, went over to op3 and stone there.. jason pulled me there to keep him accompany.. talked quite a bit with him, we ended up doing 2 man duty all the time.. haha.. complained quite a bit to him also! haha..

took annual leave to go for driving test today.. FAILED!! ever met anyone so stupid to mount the kerb like me?? immediate failure!! went to book for another test! hope i can drive a car for this coming CNY!!

tomorrow got to stay in camp.. got a rehearsal in the morning, den got to board a LST in the night for live firing on board..

supposed to go for pistol live firing today also, but gotta give it a miss due to my test! and i wasted my leave, as i failed it!! bleahs..

okays, nothing much else happen..

2008-01-17T23:11:00.000+08:00

tmr's mounting will be so much different than the normal mounting.. the ssc1o guys, esp for those ord-ing in feb, will be mounting for their last time.. and this last time, they will only be mounting 3 days.. till coming monday.. having mixed feelings on this issue.. on one hand, happy that at least some of us can get out of the horrible place and go and enjoy their life, on the other hand, i know i will miss them a lot.. cos they are really closed to me.. on one hand, happy cos after they are gone, we the batch 12 guys will be considered quite experienced and lao jiao as they called in hokkien.. which also means more shit to come, anything, we will be put in charge and questioned..

wells, i somewhat dont feel like mounting tmr, for a different reasons from the normal mounting days.. i just dont want to mount, cos i know that i wont have the chance to mount with these ppl again.. yups, you may say that we can always meet up outside, in the civil world, but somehow the feeling will be totally different.. the ord-ed guys will not know or will not care about what happen in base and our topic will be totally different.. the most we asked them is what are you doing?? working?? how's life?? thats all we asked..bleahs..

alrights, time really flies, i guess.. just when we get closer to the seniors, they have to go le.. i just hope that i wont shed a tear on monday.. i always feel emotional when it comes to parting.. it took me quite some time to settle down after sec sch and jc, when we are parting, cos i know that, after that day, we will seldom have the chance to meet up again.. even if you do meet up, the feeling will be so different..

HAIZ...

2008-01-13T10:53:00.000+08:00

fresh new year! 2008=)

suddenly i dont feel like going back to camp for duty anymore.. i dont want to mount!! cos after this mounting, a lot of people will not be mounting with us in the future.. the 10th batch of ssc will be ord-ing.. am quite closed to most of them, so after they ord, will feel the loss of people.. bleahs.. esp those people whom i get closer this few weeks, after much interacting with them.. haiz, cant help but feel emo again.. never mind, i guess my turn will come soon, when i leave my unit and by then, probably i will feel happy to leave or probably feel sad when leaving..

anw, just passed my boat driving test yesterday, will be going down to get my license and soon, i can drive out in the sea!! how exciting can that be!! next time can go out sea and fish and do lots of things=) was super duper lucky yesterday.. think the examier close both eyes to let me pass, either that or he was impressed by my driving skills, that he did not take into account my theory or oral component=) thanks goodness!

okays, this training week gonna be crazy.. going to ecp for a run, got to go for CO PT, then got to take ippt! i think it will be a miracle if i can get a silver or even a pass!! haiz.. life goes on, i guess.. cant wait for nov to come..

anw, happy birthday to the jan babies: fuquan, vantan and zhiming!

2007-12-29T12:32:00.000+08:00

finally back to update my bloggie..

the year is going to end soon! which means, i have less than a year to leave ns! haha.. cant wait for that day to come, where i get back my pink IC:)

wells, christmas was spent in camp.. not a very good feeling though, although i dont celebrate christmas, but spending a festive season in camp kind of sucks, but anyways, we have no choice also! and those christmas shows and movies does not help in getting rid the bad feeling.. haha. in fact it make me feel more sucky! never mind, at least it is over.. thanks to those who wish me merry christmas!

at first, thought that we can have out new year day to ourselves! but i was so wrong! got a liev range on the 2nd jan, so have to stay in on the 1st! bleahs, this kinda of sucks, but got to suck it up and stay in!

chinese new year is also gone for me, will only be out on the 2nd day of chinese new year in the morning, hopefully will be able to secure the next 7 days of the chinese new year:)

anyways, life is quite monotone for me in ns.. everyday sitting in the ops room, playing psp, watching tv! disturbing my dear seniors.. heehee.. watching the sea, going for screening and patrol in the sea.. wells, i guess life have to go on though it is not the way we want it, but i like this kind of life more than those going to chiong and unable to bath and eat fresh rations!

yesterday got a mini class gathering! great to see some of our classmates again.. although some of the guys are unable to make it, but still its great la.. thanks van for organising it:)

okays, i guess thats all from me now! take care ppl..

2007-11-22T10:58:00.000+08:00

小故事的寓意

蜗牛

小蜗牛问妈妈: 为什么我们从生下来，就要背负这个又硬又重的壳呢?

妈妈: 因为我们的身体没有骨骼的支掌，只能爬，又爬不快所以要这个壳的保护!

小蜗牛: 毛虫姐姐没有骨头，也爬不块，为什么她却不用背这又硬又重的壳呢?

妈妈: 因为毛虫姐姐能变成蝴蝶，天空会保护她啊。

小蜗牛: 可是蚯蚓弟弟也没有骨头，爬不快，也不会变成蝴蝶他为什么不背这个又硬又重的壳呢?妈妈: 因为蚯蚓弟弟会钻土，大地会保护他啊。

小蜗牛哭了起来: 我们好可怜，天空不保护，大地也不保护。

蜗牛妈妈安慰他: 所以我们有壳啊! 我们不靠天，也不靠地，我们靠自己。

启示每个人天生总有自己生存的方法，只要认清自己的长不要总是觉得别人的条件比自己好，你就能快乐地找到最适合自己的定位，活成功的自己。

2007-10-11T20:07:00.000+08:00

woohoo!! back again to update this very outdated blog..

anyways, took IPPT test today.. was very very very happy with my results! because i can finally jump 225cm! okays, maybe this is nothing much to some of you guys out there, but standing broad jump has always being my weakest station, and my best jump in the past is only 221, short of 4cm to get myself a silver.. thats why i am happy=) however, my run time has deproved!! i only clocked a 11.25 mins.. which is much slower than i used to run, i must practised more! so that i can get a silver or gold for my second window! jia you!

2007-10-09T13:42:00.000+08:00

a month since i blogged last time.. woohoo.. somehow dont always have the feeling and mood to blog!

anyways,i am in my present unit for more than 2 months le.. kinda lost count of the time i spent doing duty.. should be around 3 months already ba.. the new batch of guys are coming in and joining us soon!! OJT period for them are over soon, this coming thursday will be their last day=) which means, friday will be their first day doing duty with us! haha.. i shall be a nice person and not be a guai lan person! like some seniors..

btw, on leave today=) feeling super happy=) okays, who wont be happy when on leave?? other than the part that the number of leave is getting lesser??? haha..

attended my cousin' wedding yesterday.. dinner was held in this vietnam restaurant.. my experience there was really great! okays, in the bad way, great! first, the place is super hard to find! and the car park there is pathetically small! end up, we have to park the car at some other carpark and walk there.. when i entered the restaurant, i was shocked! its quite small, much smaller than i expected it to be.. and i heard that there are only one hundred guests invited.. wells!! okays, its so different from our normal chinese restaurant, the tables are not round but rectangular and the dishes are not meant for one table of ten, but for 4 persons! and the dishes come in multiple of 4! like 2 pieces of chicken for each person, so in the plate, there will be 8 pieces of chicken!! that goes the same for the veggie!!!! i was shocked!! okays, the food isnt that nice and wonderful, i must say.. nearly vomitted when i tried one of the dishes.. great experience.. and the service there aint that wonderful also.. the waiter and waitress dont really understand english! when my cousin asked for refill of his drink, the waitress dont even understand him, had to get another waiter to help translate! hey, my cousin's english isnt that profound nor lousy that you couldnt understand.. and they will not automatically help you to refill your drinks once you finished, unlike other restaurant.. you gotta ask the waitress to refill for you!! its so troublesome.. alrights, but one thing good about the restaurant is the atmosphere=) the atmosphere there was great! have the high class and sosphiscated look and feel.. enough of complaining! haha.. catch up with my cousins a bit during the dinner and also their daughters.. fyi, some of my cousins already have kids and i am a uncle already! haha.. saw a couple of pretty girls also! ;)

alrights, i shall stop here and maybe shall go exercise a bit! i dont wanna get fat and round!!

2007-08-15T20:20:00.000+08:00

long long long time since i came here t post an entry..

lots of things happened in this couple of months.. passed out from ssc in end june.. was feeling happy and sad at the same time.. happy, because i can finally pass out and no need to go back there and get screamed at.. sad because passing out also mean that we need to go separate ways, some to tuas, some to changi, some to platoon 1 and some to 2.. and we gonna leave the ooc behind, esp a couple of them, who are extremely good to us=) but, wells, life have to go on..

next, went through OJT (on jobs training) for one week, ok, for 5 days only.. managed to pass the test and ready to turn ops! to turn ops means to start doing ops.. thought its going to be fun and a new experience, but after doing it for some time, i realised that it is not that fun le.. politics begin to show.. and stuffs that are not so pleasant showed up also.. people start to screw you when you do something wrong, people start to come out late for duty just because they are lazy, people start to command the newbies to do things like throw rubbish.. wells, i guess we just have to put up with all these nonsense and suck it up..

havent been in much contact with my jc friends.. missing my class and my cca friends.. happened to see collen by chance during one of the outing to marina GV with my platoon to watch simpsons.. so happy to see her=) guess all the girls should be in uni already and the guys are still in army, cursing and swearing for the waste of 2 years..

recently the peopl around me are so in love! this is so irritating.. used to disturb those bunk mates who talked to their girlfriends in the bunk LOUDLY! as long as other people in the bunk can hear you, that means that you are loud! please learn to keep the conversation between the 2 of you!! anyways, i will definitely make fun of people who cannot control their volume esp when speaking with their other half.. ;)

looking at all these people, i suddenly thought of HER!! haha.. but what position am i to ask her out, to ask her to be my stead??? people are in uni already, with so many much better guys than me.. i guess i just have to put the past away and concentrate on what i am doing! haha..

okays, gtg le.. going to watch tv!! take care guys:)

2007-05-31T12:45:00.000+08:00

heyhey, i am back=)

10 weeks is almost gone for my course, left with 2 more days to the end of 10 weeks=) predicted duration for my course is 12 weeks, which means, i have 2 more weeks to endure to the end of this course!! ahh, hope that the 2 weeks will go smoothly for me=)

ippt is coming up again.. anyways, present status for ippt is only a PASS!! i want to get a GOLD!! but my standing broad jump is giving me a problem.. i cant even get a constant 216 every time i jump, how am i going to get 234??? never mind, i was told by my sgt that the brain play a big part, from now, i am going to dream that i can jump 234 easily=) and i will improve my run to make it 9.44 mins for 6 rounds~

alrights, was the platoon ic for 2 days, last thurs till this tues, considering that we book out on thurs last week, due to navy open house=) experience was okays la, but quite stressed at times.. and have to shout a lot a lot.. but was quite relieved that my ic days are over.. haha..

tomorrow will be my ATP!! my marksmanship is dependent on tomorrow~~ whether i get my 200 bucks or not, depends on tomorrow.. haiz.. but i dont think i will get it though..

okays, gtg le.. wishing all a happy vesak day=)

2007-05-05T14:48:00.000+08:00

woohoo!! my 100th entry=)

quite some time since i last blogged, if i am not wrong, the last time i blogged was 8 apr..

this week should be a short week for me, cos of the public holiday! BUT due to the 40th anniversary of navy, we had to stayed back yesterday for today's parade.. bleahs..

anyways, i am like halfway through the course already! feeling more used to the regimental style, but still cant accept some instructors who seem like they cant sleep at night if they dont shout or scream at us.. wells, seems like they love to nag=(

anyways, i am so happy!!! smu accepted me for accountancy=) my trip to smu is not wasted!!! and ntu accepted me for combined degree for econs and maths, which i cant even remember that i register for that course and have totally no idea what is that course about, nevermind, i shall go and research and see which course interest me more and will let me have a brighter career in the future=)

okays, i shall stop here, till the next time when i have something to write about.. take care people!

2007-04-08T15:10:00.000+08:00

heys, i am back=)

went to ocs (officer cadet school) in the morning to visit my brother=) they had this parent visiting day this morning, so i took this golden opportunity to pop down there to see how their school look like=)

and as expected, some of the training there are tough! phew that i didnt make it there, if not, probably i will die halfway through the course!! and, saw some of my friends=) oh btw, for those in 10A, kannan make it to ocs, so if you are wondering where he is posted to, he's at ocs.. saw him in the morning too, did not change much though..

saw some of my bunk mates also and company people also!! wells, all the best to ocs peeps, hope that you guys will survive the training there and come out as an officer!!

some pics that were taken this morning:-

2007-04-06T23:18:00.000+08:00

another week past..

lots of running and swimming this week.. how i wish all the running sessions are converted to swimming session!! the runnings are driving us crazy, not just me, but all of us!!! sprinting and running.. argh.. how i wish this course would end soon.. my 13 weeks of training to end soon..

going for live firing again on monday=) okays, quite miss the live firing that i had at bmt.. its quite fun, but scary at the same time, having to worry about misfire and not hitting the target.. but, now, its more scary, cos we will be CHARGED if we misfire, and its easier to have a misfire with gpmg!!! please pray that nothing bad will happen to me this coming monday, i dont want to be jailed!!!

anyways, quite glad that we have this good friday break, but the thought of having to go through a 5 days week this coming monday makes me sad.. nevermind, i shall enjoy my long weekend before its gone=)

i dream of her again yesterday night!! why?! thought i have gotten over her long time ago and the fact that i did not meet or see or bump into her by chance would have lead to me to forgetting her, but somehow, she appeared in my dream yesterday.. wells, maybe its cos i am not tired enough, like during the tired nights at camp, that leads me to having extra energy to dream.. haiz.. or does the dream means something??

okays, its getting kinda late.. time to sleep.. *yawn* on a normal day at this time, i would have been asleep on my bed in camp le.. nights and take care guys=)

2007-04-01T10:01:00.000+08:00

woohoo! back for my weekend break=) after spending one week at changi naval base, okays, shall call it cnb in short..

initially, thought that i could start to leave my hair long and was elated about it, but later i realised that i was so wrong! my hair is now shorter than those recruits in bmt! argh.. nvm, i only had to maintain this hairstyle for the next 3 months..

anyways, i am now enlisted to become a sea soldier, dont ask me about what that is, cos it is a relatively new vocation and i am only the 12 batch of sea soldier, let me understand more about it, then tell you=)

life there is not as easy as in bmt, its more regimental and stricter! we even have to iron and starch our uniform and cap!! alrights, but i guess its good for us?!

and we still need to exercise! running and swimming is considered as a norm for us.. running for 15 mins and swimming for 1 hour plus and not forgetting our daily march of 2 km to our lecture area and before meals pull up regime!!

alrights, shall not say so much le! shall upload my new hairstyle and my pt attire soon!! anw, its the shortest in my entire life.. yups, both my hairstyle and shorts, they are the shortest that i ever had in my entire life!!!

okays, so this is my new hairstyle!! its really short and pathetic!!!! and look at my pt attire!! the shorts are really short!!! can almost see what colour is my underwear!!!

2007-03-22T11:48:00.000+08:00

long time since i touched my blog..

anyways, life now i shiok!! cos i am having my block leave:) in case you are wondering what the hell is block leave, they are leave where we stay at home, no need to go back to pulau tekong, while waiting for our posting to be out, so that we know which unit are we posted to.. after which we will just report to our new unit and stay there till our 2 years is up.. den leave ns life for uni life.. sounds simple, huh??

btw, this block leave is fattening!! non-stop eating, sitting in front of the computer and television and no exercising seems to bring more harm than benefit to my waist!! but i am loving this kind of life:)

anyways, posted out of tekong.. felt a bit sad also.. i always feel a bit sad, when i leave somewhere.. from primary school to secondary school, from secondary school to jc, from jc to ns.. from bmt to somewhere else.. yups, always feeling a bit sad.. okays, i am just emotional.. haha..

but life in bmt is really great.. especially for my company---whiskey:) oh btw, in case you dont know yet.. my company is whiskey company, which is well known to be a welfare company, which means that we slack a lot:) this, i have to agree.. after mingling with other company's recruits like Orion and Ninja, i am really fortunate and thankful that i am posted to Whiskey:) the training that they do at Orion and Ninja is more tough than ours and their discipline is much more xiong than ours.. phew.. ours is just like a chalet.. doing some push ups, chin ups, crunches, jumping jacks sometimes..

really miss my bunk!! and those people who made my bmt life so happy.. we tend to laugh every night at some silly things that our bunk mates do.. haha.. live shooting was great:) and to imagine that the rifle that we always hold in our hand for drills or our so called wife, is able to shoot real rounds makes us all feel surprised, cos we never take our rifle seriously till then.. always thinking that the rifle they give us must be some damaged ones.. but hey, they can kill if feeded live rounds!! scary..

grenade was fun, the sir was talking to me all the time.. haha.. although everyone around me say that sir like to catwalk and walk like a pussy and likes to act cute and is gay.. but who cares, he is going to take me for one grenade throw only.. but i think he is nice la..

field camp and sit test was okays, got to experience life out in the field and doing all the things which we used to think was disgusting, but we still did them:) things like shitting in the vegetation and peeing without washing your hands!! okays, there are only a few people who can hold their bowels for 6 days!! i am one who cant, so i experience squatting in the vegetation and doing business!! that is the fastest one in my whole life, cos we have to do it fast, before the housefly start irritating your ass!! haha.. and, have to apply make up everyday--camoflage cream.. surprisingly, they did not cause any pimple outbreak on my face:)

okays, i guess i have gross many already or bored to death.. got to go already.. still need to report back to tekong for GUARD DUTY!! sians.. but this is just my luck, to be called back during my block leave:(

take care people:)

2007-02-03T12:00:00.000+08:00

havent been blogging for ages.. okays, not ages la, only 3 weeks only la..

anyways, life in ns, is still quite okays.. so far, still surviving la.. but the training is going to get tougher as the day goes by..

will be going on field camp on the week after next.. so, have to be confine on that island again this coming weekend!

weishun, zhihong and elvin are going for their field camp tomorrow, so, they cant book out this weekend, wells, that will be the same for me next week..

okays, nothing much to blog la.. take care people..

into my 3rd weeks of BMT, 6 more to go!

2007-01-11T12:05:00.000+08:00

i realised that i laugh a lot, when i am unhappy.. this is really strange!!! so next time if you see my laughing non stop, you will know that i am feeling down!! haha..

yesterday, had dinner with the biz people! thanks for the dinner, guys.. and had a good time laughing away..

today is elvin, weishun and zhihong's enlistment..

tmr will be mine! kinda excited and nervous now.. dont know what to expect tomorrow..argh...

okays, i think i better go and do some packing now=)

2007-01-10T09:51:00.000+08:00

LAST DAY OF WORK!!!!

thats something worth getting excited about.. after all the boring moments in office, staring ino the laptop for the whole day, looking forward to lunch time and off time=) finally its gonna end today!=)

anyways, i am feeling better today=) much better than yesterday.. decided to leave everything to fate=)

oh by the way, got a job on hand, guess it will be more applicable to girls ba..

here goes:

DIAPER PROMOTOR

working hours: saturday and sunday only, 1pm-9pm..

and and, most importantly, must be younger than 50 years old!! so, you must be eligible, cos i am young and people i know are also young!! interested, just contact me!!!

okays, i shall just stop here for the time being..

take care peeps..

two more days to my enlistment!!

2007-01-09T10:53:00.000+08:00

today's a long long and draggy day.. i have no idea why..

feeling kinda moody today and like in a daze.. somehow, things around me dont seem to interest me today.. nothing at all.. i seem to be like in a world of my own.. deep in thoughts..

how could a sms affect me so much.. but, again, i dunno whether its the sms that result in this..

wells, hope that i will be alrights soon..

2007-01-08T21:15:00.000+08:00

the feeling of being adult is both great and sad, especially during bus rides..

when hearing the beep, instead of beep beep, i feel that, hey, i am finally an adult, paying adult fare, and no more those students, paying the children rate..

wells, when i look at the amount of money left.. wells, its quite sad, money is quickly used up.. haiz.. is it better to be an adult or not???

saturday was 10A bbq.. quite disappointing that not all 10A peeps turn up, but i guess the attendance is not bad le=) had lots of fun catching up with friends, and laughing at jokes, and seeing the changes in each of us.. the most drastic change is seen in clarice! slim down, with braces, wearing contacts.. she has become one mei nu! u-know-who was drooling at the sight of her! haha..

alrights, nothing much to blog about.. shall end here..

wishing jinyuan and my cousin all the best in their enlistment tmr=)

2007-01-01T17:33:00.000+08:00

happy new year!!

alrights, first entry for the new year 2007=)

wishing all who read this, a happy new year and a great year ahead..

and good health and great success..

and those a levels and o levels students, wishing all to get superb results when it is released in feb/mar 07..

those going into ns, good luck and come out in a piece.. and take lotsa care..

those girls going into uni, jia you, you girls will be faster than us, in academic terms, but be careful of the guys in uni, kies? they might not be good.. and study hard, uni life will definitely be different from jc ones, but, i guess it will be fun=)

alrights, going for dinner already=) happy new year=)

2006-12-26T10:18:00.000+08:00

christmas was yesterday.. new year is in a few days' time.. i love year end=) lots of holidays to loook forward to, and lots of year end sales, pre christmas sales, post christmas sales, new year sales, and whatever names they can come up with..

attended my cousin's wedding on saturday night in malaysia, and only return back to singapore on sunday evening.. wells, the wedding, is kinda ekks.. firstly, the music was way way too loud! plus the singers arent that wonderful, their singing are yucks.. then, they are exactly singing karoke, looking at the televsion on the stage and not daring to move away, in case they forgot the lines and have no where to refer to! oh my god, the singing part sucks..

the food is okays, except the sharks fins, its more like drinking plain soup, can hardly see any fins in the soup..

then, the toilet, its so dirty, and furthermore, there are no labels on the doors that indicate whether its male or female toilet.. have to go in the toilet to see if there is any standing cubicle, to confirm that it is a male toilet.. this is really bad..

okays, enough of complaining about the lousy kampong place, but what to do?? its a kampong afterall, but on the brighter side, i am fortunate to be able to see how a kampong looks like, as this scene is totally opposite of singapore.. yups, and i got to see flood, that is as high as the roof of the house! poor people, their farms and houses are spoilt by the floods and rains.. lucky i am living in singapore, where it is rather safe, other than some low lying areas, the rest of singapore are quite safe from floods..

after reaching singapore, the first thing i got, was a phone call from mrs campbell!! haha.. quite surprised=) anyways, i rushed home to get my present, and shot off for a party at calina's house, wells, jinyuan and zhenyao was there=) otherwise, i would not have gone..

didnt go to orchard with them, cos its kinda late and my eyes cannot take it, aftera not-so-good night at my uncle's house.. so went home after christmas dinner..

went to chinatown with my family yesterday=) bought a couple of watches, yups, thsoe cheapo types, cos i wont be able to wear them much in jan, so didnt bother to get those expensive ones..

okays, back to now, i am stoning in the office, cant wait for lunch time to come, at least can go out and walk walk.. heehee..

2006-12-18T16:48:00.000+08:00

okays, quite some time since i last blog..

went for biz pyjama party on friday=) its FUN!! wells, to see all of us in pyjmas.. kinda cool.. but, its quite a pity that not a lot of people from biz went, or rather, very few biz members went.. wells, thats nothing that the organisers can do..

anyways, i just realised that i am always packed on the weekends, since the end of my a levels exam.. lets recount..

immediately after my chem paper 1, i left for malaysia for a meeting, which result inme losing a friday and a saturday, and a trip to vivo city with the non bio hunks and babes of my class...

second weekend, was spend partially at work, due to OT and partially at temple, as a volunteer as usher..

third weekend, i was in malaysia again, this time for the children's camp!! had lots of fun with the kids, and i totally get back the feeling of being a kid, and of course, gotten a taste of being a teacher, bearing the responsibilities of looking after the kids, being like a father too, having to make sure they sleep and eat well..

and, one month after my a levels, i got another camp, a leadership camp, teaches how to conduct a event or activity effectively..

and, my fifth weekend, is finally to myself and my family..went for biz party, as mentioned above.. maybe thats why, i refuse to stay over at calina's house, i want to spend more time at home, with my family=)

who knows what might happen to me tomorrow?? recently, received quite a lot of sms from temple, indicating that who and who pass away, and asking me to go and help chant, wells, sorry, i am not free on most of the days, so, didnt go down, but, i realised how fragile a life cna be, and how easily it can be lost, hence, i must make the most out of it, before i regret.. therefore, i chooes to stay at home, rather than to stay at calina's house, with the others, although i know that stayover will be more fun, but i think i have neglected y family for quite some time, given that my working hour is longer than my schooling hour.. hereby apologising to yao, jies, pz, calina, ray and fabian, for not staying over on friday..

alrights, i think i will not die in regrets, for not spending enough time with my family members and friends, but i will regret not telling her my feelings.. i will regret, if i die tmr, for not telling her that i like her, since a long time ago.. bleahs.. shall see how things go..

anyways, jies!! send me the photos soon!! i cant wait to see them.. and pz too..=)

okays, got a wedding dinner to attend this coming saturday, see i seem to have something to look forward to every week=)

and, btw, thinking of having a 10A outing soon, probably in jan, before shun, hong, kannan and me go in for ns.. 10A, what do you think?? chalet?? bbq at marina south?? quick make a choice!

2006-12-14T13:37:00.000+08:00

歌曲：爱的奉献
歌手：苏芮专辑：爱的奉献

长路奉献给远方

玫瑰奉献给爱情

我拿什么奉献给你我的爱人

白云奉献给草场

江河奉献给海洋

我拿什么奉献给你我的朋友

我拿什么奉献给你

我不停地问我不停地找不停地想

白鸽奉献给蓝天

星光奉献给长夜

我拿什么奉献给你我的小孩

雨季奉献给大地

岁月奉献给季节

我拿什么奉献给你我的爹娘

我拿什么奉献给你

我不停地问我不停地找不停地想

长路奉献给远方

玫瑰奉献给爱情

我拿什么奉献给你我的爱人

白云奉献给草场

江河奉献给海洋

我拿什么奉献给你我的朋友

白鸽奉献给蓝天

星光奉献给长夜

我拿什么奉献给你我的小孩

雨季奉献给大地

岁月奉献给季节

我拿什么奉献给你我的爹娘

啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦啦

this is the song that touched me so much that i cried in the public, where there are many people around, including my parents.. its so true.. everything sacrifices for others.. but what about ourselves?? had we ever made any sacrifice for others??

2006-12-08T11:49:00.000+08:00

going for another camp today=)

so, i am taking half day from work today=)

hope that i will enjoy today's camp.. and i will learn something from it..

just realised that this pretty girl from my office is still unattached.. always have the impression that she is attached, cos she is always with this guy, but hey, she is still single=)

alrightys, i think i am leaving office le=)

you can reach me via sms, if its important, otherwise, can drop me a mail, if you need to find me..

2006-12-04T11:54:00.000+08:00

okays, i am back from malaysia! yups, back from the children camp!

one word to describe the camp: fun

two words to describe my feelings: tired, but satisfied..

its the first time i got so close to children, and not just one or two.. but a bunch of them.. some of them got so close to me that they even sat on my legs while listening to the talks, and they even quarrelling over holding my hands and sitting beside me during meal times.. and yups, i finally feel satisfied that i can bring happiness to those children..

when the children are happy, their parents will be happy also.. i finally understand this statement.. cos when i see the smiles and hear the laughter from the kids, i will feel a sense of happiness and satisfaction too=)

a comment from a parent to me: lao shi, you got the fatherly love.. haha..

talking about fathers, the kids even went to the extent to asking me if i am married, not because i look old, but they have the impression that people get married at the age of 12, and the age of 18, i should have kids already.. haha.. super naive..

argh.. feeing tired today, cos i didnt have enough sleep for the past 2 days, having to ensure that i wake up on time to wake the rest of the boys up for the day's activities.. and shouting out loud during games and cheering get my throat worse and my voice is on its way to losing.. my hands and legs are tired from the piggy bagging and carrying of the kids and letting them ride on my legs like a horse.. but i feel happy=)

okays, i think thats enough grumbling of my arches in one day.. haha..

2006-12-01T09:20:00.000+08:00

i am on leave today!!

realised that my boss is quite nice to me recently.. dont know what has bitten her.. if you read my blog last year, you would notice that i actually complain about her also.. haha.. but, she is nice to me recently, but dont know why she is like that! now, i am kind of scared.. better to stay a distance from her!!

yups, i am on leave today.. going to go malaysia later.. i got 2 hours to prepare myself.. better hope that i dont miss anything out=)

realised that almost all the guys in my class are working.. those definite ones are weishun, benjamin, zhihong, yancong, aiktiong and me!! yups, as for the girls, i only heard of clarice and van working.. the rest not too sure.. as you can see, the guys in my class are more practical! earning money for use is more practical in today's society.. haha.. no offence though..

alrights, i have nothing else to say le.. except that life has being quite empty these few days, as there is nothing much to expect and look forward to, unlike those school days, where something can be expected in each day.. i miss those school days! okays, i mean the part, where i can see my eye candy and my crush.. haha..

okays, got to go le.. need to practise some hand signs for the song for tonight's camp fire and some songs! till then.. and take care..

2006-11-30T13:28:00.000+08:00

alrights, i am dead bored.......................

there's nothing much for me to do in the office.. yups, life's good, cos i can slack, but hey, after slacking for one week plus, i am rotting soon, but this kind of rotting is better than rotting at home.. cos money is entering my pocket as i rot here..

just went to ask my boss for half day leave tomorrow.. but she says there's something to check and wells, MAYBE i can go at 1130am for my camp! grrr...please please, let me have my leave.. gonna go to malaysia to be a teacher for a children camp, like those facil... but, how to be facil or teacher if i am going in late??? argh.. please, let me have h half day leave.. okays, its UNPAID leave..

i cant wait for the biz party to come!!!! i wanna show off my pyjamas! spent 19.90 on a pyjamas on wednesday.. wells, its nice, kies.. will put up a photo of myself in that pyjamas after the party! kinda excited.. wells, hope that it will be successful!

okays, lunch time is almost over, i am going back to rot.. see ya..

2006-11-24T12:03:00.000+08:00

hey, work is coming in this afternoon.. going to get kinda busy le..

and i kinda hate my boss!! she is the only boss who got nothing much for me to do and wells, her tone when she spoke to me is grrrr! i am going to quit after the project is over, which is about 14 dec.. maybe after that i can have my own free time..

now, i totally agree with what we learn in econs! after nationalisation, the company will be ineffective and inefficient! my office is an example! things that doesnt concern them, they wont be bother to lend a helping hand, and to help to check out.. or even to ask around.. or to help each other in the office, they are only concern with their own area of control! but hello, when your fellow colleagues have trouble, of course you have to help out, right? so what if it doesnt concern you?? maybe this is not the type that i like.. imagine someone out there who have totally no idea on how to do certain things, and you just left them alone?? sorry, i guess i am just not that kind of people!! angry now...

and and, they are often late for work, and left office early! this is a common sight in the office, spending much time i the pantry or in someone's else cubicle! riduculous!

kays, i gotta get going! take care ppl!

2006-11-24T11:53:00.000+08:00

this entry is specially dedicated to MISS LIM JIE YING

for coming up with the idea of biz having a pyjama party! if any biz clubbers are unhappy with the idea, please feel free to approach her to clarify any thing.. or if you arent feeling the fun and thrill of putting on your pyjamas, please approach her also..

HAHA, kidding la!! okays, anyways, thanks jie ying for coming up with this idea.. wells, we shall see the turn out rate, hope it will be better=)

2006-11-22T17:36:00.000+08:00

another slacking day in my office.. only did a couple of stuff and now i am typing happily away=)
today is the start of pae registration and there is quite a few chaos in office.. haha. phone on my neighbour's desk is ringing non stop.. anyways, tomorrow is the release of PSLE results, remembered my goal at that time was 220, which would be able to secure me a place in msh, but i got better than expected=)
okays, biz club gonna have a biz party!! theme to be pyjamas! haha, i think i need to go shopping for pyjamas le, cos i never wore pyjamas to sleep! alrights, the invitation card is below, nicely done by peizhi!!! thanks anw.. kinda looking forward to the party.. cos will be able to mix aound with those business seniors and to laugh and have fun!

think thats all from me for the time being, its 530 pm le, about time to log off also.. hee

2006-11-21T13:41:00.000+08:00

time now is 130=) lunch break=))

woohoo, i am loving this kind of lifestyle.. no need to worry about school work and the deadline and how the teachers will scold us if we dont hand in the assignment.. this life rocks=) now, i have my own table till the next permanent staff arrive, yups, my own cubicle, better than other temperorary clerks.. heeeeee.. this environment is even better than my own home! with the aircon, my table, which is bigger than my own table at home, a laptop=)

but, lots of phone calling to do.. grr.. but, still better than having to do school work=) but, hey, all my phone calling is worth it, kies?? the school do reply, kinda like sense of satisfaction..

but but but, i am going to grow fat soon! sitting down after lunch everyday does no benefit but to make me fat! alrights, maybe shall hit the gym, stadium or the pool soon..

okays, i am going off le, to listen to some songs.. =)

2006-11-20T10:42:00.000+08:00

typing this entry from office..

anyways, first day of work=)

kinda like back to last year feeling..

just that i am not sitting at my last year seat and of course, the temp staff here are different also.. bleahs..

but, the good thing is that there is a laptop for me to use this year.. i have to borrow from other people last year=(

wells, came back to singapore on saturday evening.. the meeting in malaysia lasted longer than expected.. it lasted for one day!! from 9 to 3, with only one hour lunch break..but, i learnt quite few things and games=) useful for organising camps in the future.. yups..

went to the food fair with my family yesterday.. woohoo, there are so much things there to try and to buy.. and i end up with a full stomach.. bleahs..

argh.. i am so bored in the office.. nothing much for me to do till friday, when the application forms come in only in the afternoon on friday.. and that means that i have to work OT on friday=( and can only go home at like 11 plus.. bleahs..

anyways, heres wishing all my friends who have yet to finish their a levels paper good luck.. for the others, have fun shopping or just hanging out with friends=)

2006-11-16T15:24:00.000+08:00

who says my bloggie is dying?? mr benjamin, i am updating now hor.. it wont die de..

i am so so happy!! left with one last paper! chemistry paper 1=) why must they put chemistry paper 1 on a friday with a break for me on thursday??? to finish my tys??

at least, it is consider quite early among half of my classmates=) feeling kind of relieved now.. cos tmr is only a mcq paper.. tmr, at this time, i will be finishing my chem paper!!!!! haha.. okays, i think i am going crazy..

finally, the a levels is going to finish already.. wonder if my 12 years of education is going to lead me to university.. i used to have this thinking, especially during PSLE.. at that time, i was pushing and motivating myself to finish the paper, thinking that if i dont get good results, my 6 years of education will be wasted.. but that was in the past.. now, it will be 12 years!!

anyways, tmr will be the last time that i will be wearing the NY school uniform.. although i always complain that the design is ugly, but somehow, i guess i will miss wearing uniform in the future.. tmr will also mark the last day that our whole class S10A is going to meet as a complete class, everyone present.. true that we can have gathering every year or as and when we like, but will every single one of us be present??? i doubt so.. haiz.. the 2 years of fun, enjoyment, suffering from teachers will be memory for all of us, i guess..

i will blog again, probably after my trip in malaysia, unless i have time to do so tmr, before i leave..

all the best to those bio people of S10A, your hardwork will be paid off de! jia you for one more week!!

2006-11-10T20:42:00.000+08:00

exactly one more week to the end of my a levels!!!

this is getting fast.. i have yet to cover all my econs notes, managed to finish the last few topic in school today, but productivity is tooooo sloooow.. i am hating it.. grrr.. somehow cant seem to get the econs concepts into my mind... grrrrr...

anyways, by this time next week, i will be in malaysia=) enjoying myself and to get ready for a meeting on the next day.. this means, that i need to make a trip down to SIR building next thursday.. is it still call SIR building??? yups, need to extend my passport, if not the furthest i can get to is singapore customs.. =)

okays, i think i shall do some chemistry reading up now!! jia you for the econs peeps in 10A!! one more week before we are done with A's!! and to the bio peeps, hang on! it will soon be over too!!

2006-11-08T11:56:00.000+08:00

okays, just finished chemistry paper 3... came out quite a few weird qns, not those that are expected.. rather things that are often overlooked came out..

anyways, its over.. now, trying to do stats, but my mind seem to be blocked, and cant even solve a simple DRV qns, which i had done quite a few times before.. sians.. hope tomorrow's maths paper will be better than yesterday..

after tomorrow, i can throw away all my maths notes and tutorials=) thats the only plus side of the a levels.. topic that has yet to come out in maths paper 1 are numerical methods, curve sketching, inequalities, small angle approximation, probability and stats.. guess calculus, like differentiation and integration will come out again.. sians.. hope it will be a manageable paper tomorrow..

after tomorrow, i can take a short break and brush up for my econs.. havent been in contact with econs for some time le.. its time to refresh my memories on that after tomorrow's paper.. okays, think i am going for a walk, before continuing to mug for stats.. arghhhh.. cant wait for 17 november to come!!!! 6 more papers to go!

see ya=)

2006-11-07T10:22:00.000+08:00

a few more hours to the start of maths paper 1!!

anyways, i finished my five years series for maths=) hope that the standard for the maths paper later, will be like those standard that i did previously=) then, probably, my A will be on the way=)

kinda like my a levels timetable.. the test dates are quite spread out! about 3 papers each week, with monday and friday being a rest day=)

okays, i think i better get back to my maths! wish me luck!

2006-11-01T12:40:00.000+08:00

woot..

less than 24 hours to the start of the a levels examinations.. its getting kinda scary and my heart is beating faster and faster as the time goes by.. less than one day to the GP exam, something that most people fear, i am no exception..

trying to read something related to singapore, like the policies and problems that singaporeans faced, hope that they will be useful tomorrow..

just wanna wish all my fellow friends, good luck for tomorrow's paper, hope that everyone will enter the exam venue with confidence and leave the place with smiles on their faces=)

kinda looking forward to the period after the a levels=)) somehow, the exam period always pass very quickly, before there is enough time to do any sufficient and satisfactory revision in between the papers.. hope i can last till the last day, that i will feel confident everyday entering and exiting the exam venue, cos i know that i will do well.. thats only my wish=)

wells, going to search for more information and do some read-ups le=)

jia you people!!

2006-10-27T20:09:00.000+08:00

studying alone proves to be a success and productivity is high=)

went back to school to study alone today.. and i did quite a bit of maths revision.. quite unexpected that i managed to finish a couple of maths paper, but probably this is due to the papers are easy=) yups, the maths papers in the maths five years series, are do-able, hope that the paper we are sitting on 7 nov is of similar standard=)

we have less than one week to the start of a levels and less than one month to end of it=) notice the emphasis is placed on the ending of a levels and not that starting..

i have to improve my language! especially my essays!! how to improve my language in less than a week's time?? omg..

okays, i found myself a job.. starting almost immediately after my a levels, so that means, no play time for me, unless the outing is at night.. quite sad, but when i think of the money.. heehee.. my sacrifice of play time is worth it=)

anyways, i must jia you for the a levels.. as amanda said: its now or never.. so, i guess i like the former more.. ITS NOW!!! jia you ba people!!

2006-10-25T12:19:00.000+08:00

quite pissed off by irresponsible people.. i do not mind running errands for people, provided that it does not trouble me too much, am sure that most of my friends who know me well, will know this quality of me.. but hey, if the errand is done already, can you have the courtesy to sms or call me to let me know, at the very least?? i have got loads of things to do. with a levels coming up in less than one week's time, and the fact that i still have lotsof last minutes revision to do.. i am not your maid or maria and i cant be spending my revision time trying to do something for you, which have already been settled. and worse of all, not even a word of apology when i asked you about it.. grrrr.. not blaming you.. but blame it on my foolishness and my helpfulness.. remind me not to be too helpful in the future.. being too helpful is not good at times..

never mind about that.. been quite productive today=) studying alone in school is quite good=) as there are nobody to entertain me by talking to me, i have no other choice but to be entertained by my tys.. anyways, i have turned to tys already.. decided not to do the prelim papers anymore as they are quite demoralising and afterall, i am taking the a levels, not the prelims.. erm, my target is to finish my chem tys and maths fys and tys before the paper itself!! jia you ba=)

okays, gg to continue with my chem tys le.. anywaysm the haze is getting better le=)) so, that means that i can go swimming or jogging, when i feel like it=)

tata=)

2006-10-18T13:55:00.000+08:00

ohhhh.. i am so excited and must blog almost immediately after i log off.. =)

i got my enlistment letter!! anyways, i am going in on 12 january 2007.. yups, the january batch de..=)

okays, enough of excitment for a while.. back to econs mcq..

2006-10-18T12:44:00.000+08:00

i am back=)
okays, getting increasingly busy as the days go by.. we are left with less than 2 weeks to the start of A level!! to be exact, 13 days left..
my econs essay really sucks!! never hit over 17 before.. and i think i only got 17 twice.. somemore, its after reading the notes.. sians.. how i wish i can produce those essays that mrs chua gave us as good essays after the prelims.. haiz..
kept on having this feeling that my friend betrayed me.. i am so gonna kill him soon.. better let me be mistaken..

oh ya, i saw these quotes that are very interesting=)
god created earth, he relaxed. god created man, they relaxed. god created woman and they never got the chance to relax..
the doctor is the only person who can ask a woman to take off her clothes and send the bill to her husband..
son: dad, i am not going to school from tomorrow onwards. yesterday, the teacher say 4 and 5 gives 9. today she say that 3 and 6 gives 9. she is crazy..

thats my messy table!! trying to do some chemistry.. bleahs.. queen bee sucks..

okays, thats all from me for now=)
left with 13 days, 19 hours, 10 mins, 56 seconds to be exact..

2006-10-16T16:33:00.000+08:00

exactly one week from the previous entry.. kinda busy nowadays..

anyways, i have graduated from nyjc.. our grad ceremony was held last friday.. nothing special.. but i guess its the people around me and the atmosphere that made that day special.. especially like the section that teachers recorded some last words to their students.. was kinda sad when i heard mrs chua's.. maybe cos she is a good teacher and i am afraid of disappointing her with my bad results, which i have been getting for econs.. and also.. nvm, since i promised not to say..

first impression of nyjc is its a chinese school!!! but, as time goes by, i realised that people here are not so bad and not so chinese.. so, its kinda phew.. really thank all those around me who made my life in ny a memorable one.. 05S10A, biz club, Ora 39, Leepe 25=) you guys made my life in ny a meaningful one=) thanks!!!

yups, life now is kinda boring and monotone.. everyday seem to be the same.. not much excitment.. ohhh, heard that teachers and principal do visit blogs.. if you visit my blog, pls tag, kies?? honoured to have you to visit my blog=)

some photos of memories..

biz club exco..

the group of people who made me look forward to all biz events

BIZ Club=)

05S10A

the group of people who made me look forward to everyday in school..

2006-10-10T11:59:00.000+08:00

ohhh.. its almost one week that i didnt blog, quite busy recently..

i got weird classmates!! all of them feel guilty for sleeping!! and they wake up at the weirdest hour to do work!! omgomg.. hope i will not be like them.. anyways, stress level and the urgency to work is getting higher.. people are now frantically submitting assignments to tutors for reviewing and correcting, esp essays.. booking consultation with teachers is a norm.. and everyone is talking about it, just like how people used to ask each other when they meet: have you taken your lunch?? now, the IN thing is: did you book consultation with this teacher?? see, everyone is getting really worked up! but, its a good sign=) that means that there is hope that our batch of students will do well and make ny proud of us=) and of cos to push our ranking up!! although there is no such things as ranking anymore, but hey, everyone love to compare and compete, right??

anyways, talking about stress, i think stress is a double edged sword! it can do wonders as it force someone to really study hard; but it can also do great harm! like those who cannot handle it properly, they will suffer! just hope that everyone out there can handle it well and make use of stress to motivate you to study! anyways, its the last lap already, we are left with 21 days to the big a levels!! which means, 3 more weeks! there's not enough even if i spend one week for each subjects, given that i have 4 subjects to take care of.. 4 include gp la, given that my gp is always passing on the dot, i better do something about it..

to all biz people!! please keep 16 or 17 dec free!!!! because our dear president is going to army on 18 dec!! so, pls keep 16 or 17 free, where we can go for an outing before he goes in=) see, zhenyao, i am so considerate, helping you organise a farewell!=) oh, and please make a choice as to which day is preferred and where to go=)

gtg le=) take care and mug hard.. 3 more weeks to go..

2006-10-05T18:32:00.000+08:00

alrights, went for a singapore lecture at school of thought yesterday.. quite informative and learnt quite a few things from there.. like tangibles vs intangeibles..

spent quite a bit of money yesterday also.. like 50 dollars to attend the lecture, its worth it to me.. 10 dollars for lunch and dinner!! yups, have dinner at pasta though..

feeling quite tired recently.. maybe its the lack of sleep ba.. now feeling super sleepy, maybe i shall go for a nap before doing some essays for mrs chua or some gp essay for mrs tan.. haiz..

life is like a routine...

2006-10-03T19:28:00.000+08:00

argh.. life is full of ups and downs, and today is definitely one of my down days.. shant elaborate on why i am down..

realised some undesired behaviour in myself..

i am biased. i do not treat everyone the same. i look at everyone with different views. when two person ask me something similar, i will give two rather different answer. i doubt any of you will realise this. but its true. i am biased towards certain people. this is my weakness. hope that i can look and treat everyone equally.

i am easily jealous. i get jealous when people get higher score than me. i get jealous when people are better of than me. i get jealous when people get what they want, and i cant get what i want. this is another of my weakness. i must try to be more generous and not get jealous so easily. afterall, god is fair and everyone has bad points.

and, lastly, i just realised that what i wished for in the past, is hardly attainable. its quite impossible for my wish to come true. i think i shall drop the idea of trying so very hard to get something that is really out of my reach. maybe some time to think about it carefully is something which i need now.

feeling terrible now.. feeling pain in my stomach.. have absolutely no idea what cause it.. maybe it is trying to stop me from going for maths practice session tomorrow.. trying to prevent me from wasting time tomorrow when i sit in the LT.. =)

2006-10-01T11:13:00.000+08:00

happy children's day to all the children out there=)

praying that there wont be any children starving on this year children's day..

2006-09-30T15:23:00.000+08:00

ny open house!!!!
hope to see more marists coming for this event this year!! kinda exciting to see your school's junior coming to your college and you telling them that you are from their school=)
and, ohh mr kwek is so generous!! there will be shuttle bus from serangoon and bishan!!
see ya there=)

2006-09-30T15:10:00.000+08:00

the banquet...

yes, i went to catch the movie with yiyuan yesterday at j8..

reached j8 at 1 plus when the movie is going to start at only 4 plus.. bleahs.. super early lor.. so, we went to the new library to study=) the place is so crowded!! and there is not enough seats.. hopefully the nlb people can put more seats and tables there for students to study..

back to the cinema.. the cinema is so empty yesterday.. and there are only 4 students in the cinema.. pathetic.. was wondering why there are so few people.. and the rest of the people in the cinema are the senior citizens!!!! is the banquet a show only for the senior citizens or what??

anyways, the movie is quite ok=) quite pity zhang ziyi though, have to stripped to almost naked in the show.. and its not just one segment of the show, but quite a few parts, where the emperor gets intimate with her..

but, i dont get the ending!! neither does yiyuan.. haha.. anyone who watch the banquet and knows the ending, please tell me!!

oh, btw, thats the second movie in a week for me.. haiz.. i am not going to turn into a movie freak! better get some work done soon..

2006-09-28T22:35:00.000+08:00

heys=)

found a couple of relatively useful sites for GP.. i have already linked them under my links.. do take some time to look at them, if you are interested=)

jia you for A levels=)